Hello My Fellow Soul Sister!
I'm Laurie Marie.
I'm many things... I'm a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a lover, an artist, a healer, an intuitive, a medium, photographer, designer, stylist, a lover of cuteness, coffee, a dog and animals lover.
Yes, these are just a few of the many things that I am. I also know that I am strong, brave, sensitive, kind, compassionate, a total love bug and so much more...
I've come to know so much about myself over the last four years but if there’s one thing I know most about myself is that I’m a survivor and resilient as fuck (pardon my french)!
I've healed and overcome what many do not... emotional, physical, sexual abuse and trauma, teenage pregnancy, leaving an unhealthy marriage, divorce, moving across country and starting life and business all over and walking into the great unknown with a mission and a strong desire to follow my heart.
I've gone from being afraid of leaving the city I grew up in to traveling around the world and moving across country.
I've left relationships that weren't serving my highest good. I’ve had times where I’ve felt broken and still believe wholeheartedly in love. I am a hopeful romantic, a lover of people, animals and all things cute, I see the beauty in everything and everyone.
Yes, I am a survivor but surviving isn't where I want to be. Surviving is just existing; I want to live, I want to be free and thrive and experience all of who I'm meant to be!
You see most of my life I spent hiding. I was a shy kid growing up and super sensitive which meant I felt alone often, I was taken advantage of often, especially by boys and didn’t know how to use my voice or create healthy boundaries with people. This was something I had to teach myself and it was only in the last 5 years that I’ve learned how to do this.
I spent much of my young adulthood feeling trapped and victimized by men because of my financial state. There were many times I didn't feel like I had a lot of choice. I made decisions based on my financial circumstances and lived in unsafe situations at times because its all I could afford.
One of the most life changing experiences happened in my early twenties, I experienced another sexual trauma that left me using food as a way to cope. Prior to this time I was rather comfortable in my own skin but after this experience I gained 100 lbs (my body went into protection mode I realized much later) and I spent the next decade hating my body and myself.
I felt invisible most of the time which is ironic because at the height of my weight gain I had reached 250 lbs. I felt as though I didn’t belong, I didn’t feel good in my own skin and I really didn’t like what I saw in the mirror, once again I was hiding.
My self-care was non-existent, being that I worked for myself I’d rarely take the time to do my hair and makeup or some days even shower and get out of my pjs, I rarely moved my body all of which are super important part of loving myself.
I’d avoid social situations like the plague, especially one’s involving swimsuits for fear of someone judging me or making fun of me or my body. Allowing anyone else to photograph me didn’t happen which left me feeling like a total hypocrite. Here I was telling others to let me photograph them but I was terrified to do it myself.
Photographing other women helped me heal the parts of me and my own sexuality that felt bruised and broken. By helping other women celebrate themselves it helped my heart heal.
Photography is one of my many passions and the women I photographed during that time helped me heal that part of me that wanted so badly to feel beautiful, sexy, and confident in my own skin, the way I was helping them to feel. I don’t regret it, I just wasn’t ready or willing at the time to change it. Again, I was hiding and it’s ok, it’s where I was at…
Sometimes at weddings, I’d go for 10-12 hours at a wedding without using the bathroom for fear that someone might see me and think I was lazy. I people pleased constantly, allowed others to walk all over me and beat myself up about it a lot! Yes, there were many ways I was hiding the truth of who I was. I’d hide in my work, my relationships, in my body, my finances, in my dinner plate, I can’t list all the ways in which I’ve hid myself. In 2014 I had my spiritual breakdown/awakening and realized it was time to make loving myself a priority, I realized I wasn’t ok and needed help.
I decided it wasn’t serving me any longer to hate myself and I decided to make loving myself a priority. I've learned a lot about myself and life through all of my hardships, I've learned how to love myself, my body and photography has been a big part of my healing.
Over the course of the last four years I've learned to love and accept myself and my body.
It's a journey, a wild ride actually...
This journey has brought me to some incredible places like Indonesia, Maui, California and has open me up to my spiritual gifts as well.
Self love is a journey and I'm not always perfect but I'm happy to say I'm comfortable in my own skin again, I've taken back my power, my sexuality and I now help guide others to do the same!
I’m finding I don’t want to hide anymore, a shift has happened! I don’t want to hide and this time I’m willing to go first. By going first I’m hoping to encourage, inspire and empower you to do the same... My sister to stop hiding, to stop playing small and go after all of the amazing delicious experiences & desires I know you've been dreaming of.
I’m on a mission to guide you to step fully into your power, to come home to yourself once and for all, to help you eliminate the need to play small, to learn to trust yourself and your oh-so-powerful intuition and to do so from a safe space of love, acceptance and deep compassion.
It is through my divine gifts, coaching, life experience + photography that I'm sharing my gifts, shining my light and helping other women do the same!
My wish for you is for you to see yourself and be seen in the world for the beautiful and powerful amazing soul that you are!
My hope for you is to feel confident, empowered and powerful enough to step into your own mission, live a life of intention and share your gifts with the world.
I believe that it's through vulnerability and sharing our own stories that we help heal ourselves and others, thereby healing the world. Thank you for your time and for listening.
Now let’s rise together my sisters! xo- laurie marie 💕
To read my street cred... click here.