My Beautiful Soul Sister!
I'm Laurie Marie.
I'm many things... I'm a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a lover, an artist, stylist, an intuitive, a psychic-medium + photographer, a lover of all things cute, a coffee loving, dog-snuggling-animals-lover with a wanderlust that won't quit!
Yes... these are just a few of my favorite things... I also know that I AM strong, brave, sensitive, kind, compassionate, highly intuitive and a total love bug!
I've come to know so much about myself over the last five years but if there’s one thing I know most about myself it's that I’m a survivor and resilient as fuck (pardon my french)!
I've healed and overcome what many do not... emotional, physical, and sexual abuse, trauma, teenage pregnancy, an unhealthy marriage and leaving it, divorce & finally... moving across the country, fell in love, starting my life & business all over again. I have walked into the great unknown with a mission and a strong desire to follow my heart.
I've gone from being afraid of leaving the city I grew up in to traveling around the world and moving across country.
I've let go of relationships that weren't serving my highest good. I’ve had times where I’ve felt broken and still believe wholeheartedly in love. I'm a hopeful romantic, a lover of people, animals and all things cute, I see the beauty in everything and everyone.
Yes, I am a survivor but surviving isn't where I wanted to be.
Surviving is just existing; I want to live, I want to be free and thrive & experience all of who I'm meant to be and to share my mission with the world!
You see, I spent most of my life hiding. I was a shy kid growing up and super sensitive which meant I often felt alone, I was taken advantage of often, especially by boys and didn’t know how to use my voice or create healthy boundaries with people. This was something I had to learn and it's only been within the last 5 years that I’ve learned how to do this. It takes practice every day. I'm not perfect and I don't pretend to know it all but I've come light years away from where I had started.
I spent much of my young adulthood feeling trapped and victimized by men because of my inability to set boundaries, use my voice, and often times trapped by my financial state. There were many times I didn't feel like I had a lot of choice. I made decisions based on my financial circumstances and lived in unsafe situations at times because its all I could afford.
One of the most life changing experiences happened in my early twenties, I experienced another sexual trauma that left me using food as a way to cope. Prior to this time I was rather comfortable in my own skin but after this experience I gained 100 lbs (my body went into protection mode I realized much later) and I spent the next decade hating my body and myself.
I felt invisible most of the time which is ironic because at the height of my weight gain I had reached 250 lbs. I felt as though I didn’t belong, I didn’t feel good in my own skin, and I really didn’t like what I saw in the mirror, once again I was hiding.
My self-care was non-existent, being that I worked for myself I’d rarely take the time to do my hair and makeup or some days even shower and get out of my pjs, I rarely moved my body all of which are super important part of loving myself today.
I’d avoid social situations like the plague, especially one’s involving swimsuits for fear of someone judging me or making fun of me or my body. Allowing anyone else to photograph me didn’t happen which left me feeling like a total hypocrite. Here I was telling others to let me photograph them but I was terrified to do it myself.
Photographing other women helped me heal the parts of me and my own sexuality that felt bruised and broken. By helping other women celebrate themselves it helped my heart heal.
Photography is one of my main passions. At that time the women I photographed helped me heal that part of me that wanted so badly to feel beautiful, sexy, and confident in my own skin, ultimately the way I was helping them to feel. I don’t regret a thing, I just wasn’t ready or willing at the time to change and that’s ok, it’s where I was at…
Sometimes at weddings, I’d go for 10-12 hours at a wedding without using the bathroom for fear that someone might see me and think I was being lazy. My people pleasing was out of control... I people pleased constantly, allowed others to walk all over me and beat myself up about it a lot! Yes, there were many ways I was hiding the truth of who I was. I would hide in my work, my relationships, in my body, my finances, in my dinner plate, I can’t list all the ways in which I kept myself from being seen.
In 2013 I had my spiritual breakdown/awakening and realized it was time to make loving myself a priority, I realized I wasn’t ok and I needed help.
I decided it wasn’t serving me any longer to hate myself and I decided to make loving myself a priority. It's why I'm committed to celebrating women, sharing their stories, and helping others heal.
Over the course of the last five years I've learned to love and accept myself and my body.
It's a journey, a beautiful wild ride actually...
This journey has brought me to some incredible places like Indonesia, Maui, Los Angeles, to name a few and this journey has open me up to my spiritual gifts as well. In the winter of 2015 I realized I was a psychic-medium and have spent time developing my gifts ever since. I also became a Fearless Living life coach that same year. I've done the work and I'd never ask others to do anything that I haven't done myself. In March of 2017 I finally turned the camera back on myself and allowed myself to be seen for the first time in almost a decade! In a two piece no less! Still being over 200 lbs! If you would've asked me even a few years ago if I'd do that I would've said no freak'n way... I've come along way!
Self love is a journey and I'm not always perfect but I'm happy to say I'm comfortable in my own skin again, I've taken back my power, my sexuality, and I now I'm helping guide others to do the same!
I’m finding I don’t want to hide anymore, a shift has happened! I don’t want to hide and I’m willing to go first. By going first I’m hoping to encourage, inspire, and empower you to do the same... My sister its time to stop hiding our beautiful selves from the world and the missions we're here to bring to life!
It's time to stop playing small and go after all of the amazing delicious experiences & desires I know you've been dreaming of.
I’m on a mission to guide you to step fully into your power, to come home to yourself once and for all, to help you eliminate the need to play small, to learn to trust yourself, and your oh-so-powerful intuition and to do so from a safe space of love, acceptance, and deep compassion.
It's time to have the confidence you've been dreaming of so you can create from a powerful place all that you desire for yourself and others!
It is through my divine gifts, coaching, life experience + photography that I'm sharing and shining my light to help other women do the same! My hope for you is to feel confident, empowered, and powerful enough to step into your own mission, live a life of intention and share your gifts with the world.
My wish for you is for you is that you'll say YES to yourself and allow yourself to be seen in the world for the beautiful and powerful amazing soul that you are and if you feel called to, to share your own story of transformation + healing.
I believe that it's through vulnerability and sharing that we help heal ourselves and others, thereby healing the world.
Thank you for your time and for listening.
Now let’s rise & be seen together my sisters! xo- laurie marie 💕
To read my street cred... click here.