If you would’ve asked me seven years ago what self-love was I wouldn’t have had a clue. If you told me I didn’t love myself I probably would’ve told you “that’s ridiculous” and sarcastically give a comeback and walk away. Back then I didn’t have a clue how I was treating myself so poorly so why would I have thought any different.

When I first started on this journey of learning to love, accept, and even celebrate myself & my body I didn't have a clue what self-love meant. I didn't even realize that I didn't love myself.

I knew I didn't like a lot of things about my body & how I looked and I know I had thoughts from time to time that were anything but loving but I didn't realize to the degree in which I didn't love myself. It wasn’t until I had a breakdown in the Dominican Republic in front of 60 brand new strangers that I realized there was a problem.

Up until then I was humming along for over 10 years thinking nothing was really “that” wrong. Looking back now I can see it all clearly & here are just a few indicators that looking back now has helped me realize that umm Houston... we had a problem.

💕I was treating my body like it was a garbage disposal... not caring what I ate. Often binge eating or hitting up fast food joints like they were part of my meal planning, sometimes I'd even hit up multiple joints in fell swoop

💕I'd avoid social situations, especially ones that required me to wear a bathing suit

💕Negative self-talk happened on the regular [calling myself fat, stupid, lazy, etc]

💕I often used humor [sometimes deprecating humor] as a way to cope

💕Drinking to cope was also present often because I was so uncomfortable in my own skin that I needed an escape

💕People pleasing was a way of life & everyone loved me for it so I thought [until shit really hit the fan and I needed support and realized they were never really true friends in the first place]

💕Morbid thoughts of cutting parts of my body off and switching it with others would enter my mind at times. [Can you say body dsymorphia]?

💕Negative self-talk happened on the regular [calling myself fat, stupid, lazy, etc]

💕I had a lot of rules around what I could and couldn't/should & shouldn't wear based on my weight and size

💕Every dressing room visit ended in tears

💕Self-compassion didn't exist & self-care was absent if not non-existent at times

💕Negative self-talk happened on the regular [calling myself fat, stupid, lazy, etc]

💕Standing up for myself & using my voice rarely occurred

💕I obsessed over my weight & size

💕I said Yes to everything & everyone regardless if I wanted to or not

Yes, these are just a few ways I wasn't being loving or accepting of myself. I wasn't treating my body with respect or love. At one point along my journey, I thought self-love was massages, bubble baths, and scented candles.  Sure all of those things are a good start but true self-love is not only made up of self-care and bodywork [that's just to get you started] it's also about learning how to maintain & balance your energy.

Self-love is also shifting old beliefs, patterns, and mindset around people, situations, as well as yourself. It's about shifting your mindset and choosing more loving thoughts and actions.

It's learning how you process and what makes you tick. It's about building a lasting and loving relationship with yourself and attending to your needs before you give to others. It also requires you to explore and see your humanity as well as others.

To look at the parts of your personality that scare you that you hide away from others. It's healing old wounds, letting go of things that no longer serve you, and finding forgiveness of yourself & others.

It's a life long journey & it's the most incredible journey you'll ever go on if you so choose. It asks you to live with your heart wide open and allow yourself to feel. It requires you to be present in your body. It can feel scary sometimes and yet with the right support you can move through it with ease. 

I started this journey over 6 years ago and who I've become I don't even recognize in the best possible ways. I am confident, I love myself & my body no matter what, I've found the love of my life, I've learned to trust myself, I've shed almost 50lbs, I'm the healthiest & happiest I've ever been and so much more!

This is what self-love looks like my friends. I've been there, done that and continue to do my life's work & now I support others do the same.  It's some of the most rewarding work I've ever done for myself & that I do for others. This is what self-love looks like... it's freedom.

Freedom from:
💕not feeling enough
💕feeling like you're body will never look the way you want it to
💕being trapped in a body you hate
💕doing things you don't want to be doing
💕being uncomfortable in your own skin

Freedom to:
💕be & express yourself freely in the world
💕to share your gifts and be seen
💕to live the life you've always dreamed
💕to be the person your soul knows you've always been
💕to not need validation from anything outside yourself
💕to trust yourself fully
💕love & appreciate your body

Yes, love, this is just the tip of the iceberg as to what saying YES to you can do for you! It starts by saying YES to you.

Sending you all of my love & support, my wish for you is that you'll start this journey & say YES to you because you are so worth loving
- xo laurie marie 

P.S. If you're ready, check out the Brave Babe Self-Love Club & join in a loving community of ongoing support here. If you're needing private 1:1 support book a free call here.